The Packer Pups Discuss: Roster Cuts

Hi, it’s Kate the Springer Spaniel. The other day when I jumped up on the couch to remind Brian it was my dinnertime, he was reading an article about who would get “cut” by the Packers before the season.

I didn’t get this at all. They invite all these players to training camp in the summer and then send a bunch of them home? Isn’t that kinda rude? Summer camp’s sposta be fun. I never want to go to summer camp in Green Bay, I’ll tell ‘ya that. You’re not sending this pup packing.

I just had my 11th birthday party and I didn’t pick out some of the guests and say, sorry, you have to leave. You’re poodles and we need more bulldogs at this party. So what’s this cutting all about? Brian says it has to do with different types of players having different skills and you need some of each to field a successful team.

Okay, now I sorta get it. I can tell ‘ya, I watched that playoff game in Seattle and we needed a Springer just like me to jump up and catch that onside kick. Maybe I could invite some of the players to come with me when I go “Dock Diving” at the lake. They toss a toy way up in the air over the water and we Springers and Australian Shepherds go screaming down the dock, jump way out and try to catch it. It would be fun for the Packers players. They could sharpen their retrieving skills while cooling off in the water on a hot August day.

So, while I’m giving the Packers’ advice, if I were Ted Thompson, I’d look into getting more Afghan Hounds in the secondary. Sometimes our guys get beaten badly in pass coverage. Afghans are fast enough to keep up with anybody. I’ve also noticed sometimes our defense folds in the second half. We’re way out ahead at halftime than all of a sudden the game is tied. We barely have time for Dee to make us more snacks. I’d recommend adding a few Pit Bulls to the defense. They don’t tire easily and if we ever had to face a team Michael Vick is on again, that team would be shredded by the second quarter.

So I hear the Packers have to cut the team down to 75 players in a week or so. I really feel badly for every one of the guys who doesn’t make the team. They all work so hard, and they make the preseason games interesting to watch. We get to play the “who’s that guy?” game. But I guess it’s better to have been a Green Bay Packer for a few weeks than never at all.

Do they at least let the guys who were cut keep their uniforms? They oughta go home with somethin’.

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