Literary Rules for Two-Legged Companions.

Happy New Year! Rose the Irish Setter here. I thought I would try to encourage other dogs, or even two-legged companions, who may be considering writing a book, like me and Kate the Springer Spaniel did. Our book is Rose and Kate Unleashed. Brian has this lawyer friend who asked for help. Yanno he does law so he’s called a lawyer like somebody who plays golf is called a golfer or somebody who sings is called a singer. I don’t know how they came up with somebody who does art is an artist shouldn’t they be an arter? Anyways so I came up with some advice…

Rose’s Rules for the Literary Dog

Write each and every day. As you know, dogs are determined. When we start a task, such as stealing food from the counter, we complete it. That’s where the term “dogged determination” came from. We applied this to writing our book, “Rose and Kate Unleashed.” We wrote something down every day. Even just 100 words moves you closer to your goal of finishing. Somethin’ happens every day. Writing a book just means putting all the somethins on paper. Not complicated at all.

A lot of two-legged authors wait until they “feel like writing” before they get started. That’s why they never finish. Yanno, the only things I feel like each day are eating, sleeping and playing. I never wake up and think, “Who needs breakfast. Let’s get right to the computer.”
Instead, I set a goal of writing at least an hour per day, each morning. After my breakfast. You gotta have priorities. And discipline.

Take advantage of your platform. Platform is a two-legged term that means how many people you know that could buy your book. Everyone you meet is a potential customer. You just have to tell them about your book. My two-legged companions Brian and Dee made these business cards with the cover of our book on it and where to buy it. When we go for a walk and people say hello to us, they hand out a card. We also use social media such as Facebook. Brian and Dee have nearly 1,500 Facebook friends who are dog lovers. Before the book was published, they announced when it would be available and posted pictures of me and Kate hard at work at the computer. Dee recommends being subtle with your sales pitch. If it were up to me, I’d just post, “PLEASE, PLEASE buy my book!”

Make Sure the Cover is Memorable. The cover should attract your readers and help them understand what the book is about. Me and Kate’s book has us on the cover with suitcases, like we’re ready to go on adventures. And that’s what our book is about, our adventures. Brian and Dee’s latest book is called “Treasure in the Moonlight,” about the search for a pirate’s gold. “Treasure” is in gold lettering on the cover. And the moon on the cover looks like a gold doubloon. Even a really dumb two-legged individual can figure what that book is about.

Don’t Worry About Reviews. Before our book came out, Brian warned me that not everyone is going to like it, that we would get some negative reviews. Since everyone loves Irish Setters, I found that hard to believe. But I think he was trying to say, don’t take a negative review personally. The reader isn’t saying they don’t like you, just that they may not have enjoyed your book. We haven’t actually received any negative reviews yet, but if we do, the reader probably didn’t like the parts Kate wrote. My Irish Setter sense of humor is what makes our book great, I think.

Make Sure Your Story Has a Dog. And no matter how many people die in your novel, make sure the dog lives. Never, never NEVER break this rule.

Have Fun! Make sure you enjoy your writing project. Don’t turn it into a chore, like going to obedience training or something. It’s a thrill to be known as an author. We’re already being asked when our next book is coming out. How fun is that! Now I have to find out if there’s a Bestseller List just for dogs. If not, there should be.

Rose, the Literary Irish setter

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